21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?”
22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”
I love Peter. He cuts to the chase asking questions we all want to know the answer to. Here in all his magnanimity, he asks the Lord Jesus if he should forgive a brother up to seven times. Actually, he was being pretty generous. Rabbinic teaching held that the offended person only needed to forgive up to three times. Way to go Pete – graciously more than doubling the commanded act of forgiveness! Yet, Jesus’ reply shows Peter had missed the mark. It had nothing to do with obedience to a mere command rather everything to do with the attitude of the heart. There was to be no limit in forgiveness. If a brother or sister in Christ comes to us in repentance, we are to forgive – period - no matter how many times they ask. Jesus’ Word to us in the Sermon on the Mount comes to mind:
14 For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matt 6:14-15 (NIV)
It sounds like forgiveness is mandatory, particularly if we desire to be forgiven! After verse fifteen in the above verses in my Bible I have written “which are many”!
“Often hell is portrayed as a place of punishment and heaven as a place of reward. But this concept easily leads us to think about God as either a policeman, who tries to catch us when we make a mistake and send us to prison when our mistakes become too big, or a Santa Claus, who counts up all our good deeds and puts a reward in our stocking at the end of the year. God, however, is neither a policeman nor a Santa Claus. God does not send us to heaven or hell depending on how often we obey or disobey. God is love and only love. In God there is no hatred, desire for revenge, or pleasure in seeing us punished. God wants to forgive, heal, restore, show us endless mercy, and see us come home. But just as the father of the prodigal son let his son make his own decision God gives us the freedom to move away from God's love even at the risk of destroying ourselves. Hell is not God's choice. It is ours.” Henri Nouwen
I love the response the apostles gave regarding this same subject presented in Luke – an indication that forgiveness was not easy for them either:
3 So watch yourselves. “If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. 4 If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, ‘I repent,’ forgive him.” 5 The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!” Luke 17:3-5 (NIV)
“Increase our faith”, indeed! When we refuse to forgive others – when we seek revenge – we deny our common ground as sinners in desperate need of a Savior. Believers are to be a graciously forgiving people because we have been graciously forgiven. Forgiveness, which is so easy for us to accept, cost God greatly. God forgives our sin only because of the death of Jesus. Forgiveness of others will be costly to us as well. It will come as a denial of our right or our need to be right when wronged. Revenge is God’s job, not ours. And, believe me, nothing goes without His notice – nothing. Wisdom is always proved right by her actions. It is God who will right every wrong and He does such a better job. In all the wrongs He is working in each heart including our own. Paul writes:
32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Eph 4:32 (NIV)
13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Col 3:13-14 (NIV)
“You never touch the ocean of God’s love as when you forgive and love your enemies.” Corrie ten Boom
Forgiveness is also for the forgiver. People who choose not to forgive, harboring ill feelings or ill will towards another destroys themselves. Bitterness, anger, rage and wasted energy are all the results of our not willing to forgive a transgression. These don’t play out pretty in a life. Grudges should have no place in the believer’s heart. They bring us harm and not good. Ever been around someone filled with bitterness towards another? They are not very pleasant to be around, to say the least! We are to bring the offense to Jesus asking Him to help us with the forgiveness that comes from Him and let Him handle the results of the matter.